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Thursday, 30 September 2010

on feeling...

About a day ago now, I stopped by Tara's blog. Tara is an amazing photographer and a pretty great writer too. And as I was reading I read this (and I've been thinking about it pretty much ever since)...

You really have to go through pain before you can move into a new phase, a new place in your head or heart. So often I am scared of that pain, afraid it will overwhelm me - ruin my life or my day. I hide from it, avoid it, make poor choices in order to stay numb to it. When I do that, the pain just takes hold. It moves in like a wasp's nest, constantly buzzing about my head. Something you know you have to deal with, but are afraid to because you don't want to get stung. I am learning more and more that accepting those feelings and letting myself feel them is the way I want to go.

When you give yourself permission to feel what you feel, it is giving yourself permission to be who you really are. There is a peace in that, and a sincerity that feeds you.

It is the best way that I know to take care of myself.

Ofcourse, I knew it, really. I just needed to hear it - or read it!

Thank you Tara

Friday, 24 September 2010

Hello old friend....

It's been a while. Ok, that's a lie, but I have tried to live without you. I find in my current state of mind, however, I cannot. I neeeeeeed you and the comfort you bring. Meet me in the lounge in 10 minutes and I won't tell anyone if you don't! ( I'll be the one holding the spoon )
Love, me xx

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Thursday, 23 September 2010

The choice...

Get off my sorry behind, go to weight watchers and be myself again, or, let the current black mood get the better of me and take me where it will...

'nuff said!

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Location:Manchester,United Kingdom

I always get the blame...

... for all the pens going missing. But now I know the truth. I have photographic evidence!


The real pen thief!!
(she stole this one from Dave's bedside table!

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Wednesday, 15 September 2010

Staring out of the abyss...

in some ways is not much different than staring into it. Except for one thing - the fear is gone. there is no fear because you are there. You know exactly how it feels.  And you start to wonder, does it feel good, almost? to realise your nightmare, and to realise there is a peace in knowing that it couldn't feel worse than this.
    Sure, I'll pull myself out, when I am ready to. The truth is I don't want a hand to help me. I don't want to talk about it. I just want to sit, quietly and look out on the world I once thought I knew my way in. And resolve that when I do get out It will be in my way, and where I want to. Maybe not where you think I should.

If breaking makes us stronger, then I will be stronger. When I choose to be.

Sunday, 5 September 2010

T minus 1!!!!!!!!! ;)

Saturday, 4 September 2010

T - Minus 2 days

Friday, 3 September 2010

T-minus 3 days...

Wednesday, 1 September 2010

T - Minus 4 days


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